When chatting made sense!

AndroidPIT-WhatsApp-hero-br-1107How many of you remember the days of online chat rooms? There was a room for every topic and interest. With an internet connection, you would never be bored. Obviously that era passed – which is super sad for some of us. It was a great way to pass time while connecting with people of same interests.

Where am I going with this? Well, I finally got my first leave in so many years of non-stop working. I actually made a decision to completely disconnect from both the official work and all my other side hustle tasks. The day started off well, I got some time to really watch and enjoy a movie at home and when I was done, I found myself getting bored in the afternoon. A couple of times, I literally found myself trying to check and reply my emails.

This got me wondering, are there specific topic WhatsApp groups, whether private or public, that are your spend time on, and what are their terms and conditions? To get this started, I decided to make a post where I will list some of the groups I know or I am a member of.

Here we go;

Name Description Terms Invitation Link
PR Without Boundaries A group for PR & Communications people. A break off from the Public Relations Association of Uganda group You must be a PR Practitioner Private
Breaking Online A news focused group, sharing everything from invitation to pressers, to actual press releases. Members are mostly media personalities You must be an online editor for a news agency & Gov’t PRO Private
Mountain Slayers People that love hiking and climbing mountains. They have hikes almost every month, ranging from simple hills climbs to Mountain climbing You must take at least three hikes with the group before you are invited to the group Private
Mama Tendo Foundation (The Chased) A breakaway group from Mama Tendo Foundation. 90% Luganda.

Mbu A family group mostly for ladies, but with some few men too. Highly addictive, enjoy responsibly. Paradise for the oppressed. No pornography or abusive language allowed.

Public Click the link with WhatsApp web open
Duolingo Challenge A support group for individual that are learning languages using Dou Lingo App Public Challenge ended

What groups are you a member? You know, groups where you can join and have a sensible or pointless chat – depending on what works for you, and when you are done, you can exit or stay.

Don’t forget to share the invitation link or how one can join.

Thanks

Love & Life

Screen Shot 2018-03-15 at 4.51.41 PMMy wife and I have been going through one of those times where you annoy each other more times than usual. It had got so bad to the point where every time we tried to have a conversation, it always ended up with us getting angry at each other – most times over petty things.

A while ago, she proposed that we should talk to someone, and me with my huge ego from Bushenyi that can fill a pioneer bus alone, I obviously refused. She didn’t give up on the idea – she is an extremely stubborn woman. She went a head and scheduled a coffee with Bishop Zac. I have to say, I respect that Bishop and there is no way I was going to stand him up. So, I allowed to meet him and I have to say it was easier than I thought and obviously much more rewarding than I expected.

We had a great one hour chat with the Bishop, who listened more than he contributed. Here we were, talking to each other in a way that we had not done in a while. I was listening and she was listening. Our issues were pretty much resolved by ourselves! All the Bishop had to do was sit there, listen and allow us to express ourselves.

Anyways, this experience got me thinking about love and life. It got me reviewing the relationships and the people around me. It is very interesting to note that Romantic love can actually be more destructive than we think. You have seen all these love crimes that happen every other day? How about the greatest love story of all time; Romeo and Juliet. It was actually a more chaotic story that we realize. It was filled with death, feuds and suicide!

Studies show that love is like a drug – cocaine to be precious! Love gives us the stimulating effect to the brain, just like cocaine does. When in love, we experience intense highs when things are good and then crash down hard when things go bad. That is why, there are people who get heartbroken all the time but just keep on getting from one relationship and straight into another – they never stop. These are pretty much addicted to the love high. They tend to use love as an escape from their problems or as a distraction without even knowing it.

It is very interesting to note that back in the day, our forefathers new about these effects of love and thats why marriages were not based on love but rather on respective skills sets of the partners. How well do they compliment each other? How well will they be able to support each other to do great things? These days however, most marriages are based on love and when the high is over, most of us do not know how to deal. Hence, more divorces than back in the day.

I know people who got married or are married for love are probably rolling their eyes, and a few others thinking… Shoot! We are doomed! No, we are not! There is a backdoor to making things work. Instead of focusing on your feelings – that is the love high, focus on supporting your partner. In simple terms, be a friend. When the high goes down – which it always does, you shall still have the friendship bond to jump things up and get the high effects back on.

To happier relationships.

PS. There is no shame in talking to someone about your issues. Do not bottle things up. They will blow up and it will be too late to get help.

PPS. They say to conquer your flaws, you must first accept them.

PPPS. Yes, he asked the question.. How is your sex life?!
God! That question!!! It never stops being awkward answering that question.

Dreams that we can’t make sense of!

How would you wake up feeling after seeing this guy in your dream?  Picture credit - 3rd year CG Student, at ESMA - Intern at Multiply (Paris)

How would you wake up feeling after seeing this guy in your dream?
Picture credit – 3rd year CG Student, at ESMA – Intern at Multiply (Paris)

I had an extremely strange dream this morning. I am calling it a strange dream because it did not make sense at all. I fully know that the act of trying to interpret dreams is simply infusing them with meaning and significance and NOT necessarily getting the actual meaning of the dream.

I hardly ever dream – well, I am sure I actually do dream but I am never alert enough to remember them. The thing about sleeping is, when we sleep our brain does not go to sleep. It instead goes through a process of storing and sorting the information we learned or picked up during the day. Sleeping and dreaming is actually an additional time for us to continue learning and solving life’s problems. 

Back in the day when I used to play a lot of video games and write some code – yes I did, I would be in bed sleeping and all of sudden I would figure out a way to get past the level that had been giving me a hard time or the issue that had made my code failing to run or a better way of writing that if statement that wasn’t working right.

Ever heard the phrase sleep on it? It is actually used because when you go to bed, your brain goes on to try and figure out or expand your options about the issues. During sleep (REM Sleep) our mind uses metaphors in dreams to help us solve our real-world problems. 

During the REM sleep which is the time when our dreams are more vivid, the part of our brain (I wont get into the science names) which is home to our emotional memory becomes 15% more active than when we are awake. That is not all, it goes further! The particular part considered to be directly related to our consciousness and sense of free will and self-awareness is the most active part of this part of our now more active part of our brain – Ok, lets use its name for better understanding, the anterior cingulate gyrus. Interesting right?

It doesn’t stop there! Another vital part of this now 15% more active part of our brain, is the hippocampus, which is the part that connects our emotions with past memories in order to make new memories. This will make sense in my dream below – keep reading

Key to also note is that during this dreaming time our brain’s prefrontal cortex which is responsible for our logical reasoning is entirely shut off and that is why our dreams are often times utterly bizarre.

Ok, with all that education here is what I remember of my dream.

I was in some sort of school setting, It was closely related to my high schools dormitories, class blocks mashed up. – Hippocampus at play here. Then there was some sort of wind/hurricane kind of activity and Robert Kabushenga walks in. He appeared to be the head of the institution or something. Next thing I know, we were jumping and swinging on the building roof frames like ninjas and then Robert jumped and held onto a part of the roof that was a weak spot and it immediately broke and he fell backward – It looked like a two level high fall! 

Next thing I know I was being chased by this group of some specialized army that seemed like a morph of ninjas and zombies. They caught up with me and I was presented to their master/leader who was Rev. Fr Mukama, who was my high school teacher and he died just last week. 

It was at that point that I completely freaked out and snapped out of it. You know, in the usual state we be in after such dreams – sweating, breathing hard and scared. 

I should mention something about the being scared bit or when we wake up or during our dreams. Remember that cortex part that I talked about earlier? The logic reasoning cortex part that is shut down during our dreams? Well, there is actually a part of it that is always awake! That is the part connected to the amygdala which controls our fight or flight instincts but during the REM sleep our bodies are more less paralyzed, and that is why we do not hurt ourselves during our dreams. 

Another interesting thing to note about dreaming is, animals too dream. Yes! But unlike us, animals can’t tell the difference between a dream and reality. If a rat dreams that the cat in the house left in the middle of the night, when it wakes up, it will walk-like-a-boss into the house because it knows that the cat left at night and BOOM! It will be Tom and Jerry all over again.

Anyways, that was my dream this morning, I am not going to make a lot of sense out of it but here are my quick thoughts without stressing too much;

  1. Robert Kabushenga appeared in my dream because for the last couple of days I have been either talking about him or thinking about him, thinking about him sound wrong, no?! There is an important communication I am waiting on from him that is not coming through – Robert if you are reading this, please send the communication through. 
  2. The late Rev. Father Mukama appeared in my dream because he passed on last week and he was a key figure in my early days of high school. May his soul rest in peace
  3. The Ninjas.. hmmmmm.. I bloody love ninjas. I think they are awesome – I have always thought so 🙂

Alright there goes.. another dream that I can’t interpret or make much sense of